I feel strongly that my ability to engage in both global and local revisions has increased throughout the duration of this English composition course. When specifically referencing the chosen work sample, one of the more local areas of concern was providing more effectiveness with the summary of my first body paragraph. This mostly included offering more personal experiences when attempting to connect with the technologically absolved youth of our nation, as that is what that specific paragraph aimed to tackle. In response, I was able to further provide context on an example concerning my nephew. “I oftentimes find myself playing my nephew’s favorite game to bond with him, as he is not interested in general conversation. In a world where technology is becoming the glue to our cognitive functions, we are crowding our necessities with nonsense” (Briggs 2). This type of revision is essential for developing a good paper in English composition, as these types of assignments required personal insights from the author. Additionally, I was able to make other local edits to this project such as rephrasing specific sentences for flow and conciseness and omitting redundant information for clarity.

Furthermore, when discussing the global—or overall concerns of my paper throughout the revision process, I found that my ability to detect such concerns prior to the revision process had drastically improved. My first couple of projects had more specific, more alarming concerns, such as completely stripping and rewriting my thesis or supplementing better examples for textual evidence. However, when referring to the more recent chosen work sample I have provided, my peers and I feel as though I did a good job at elaborating on such aspects. The only global concern I felt as though I needed to address concerned that of reinforcing my own opinion when approaching my thesis sentences. For example, my thesis originally started with “While our generation may be shifting towards a technological outlook on life, along with its many benefits for productivity, we are struggling to balance our primal necessities.” This thesis is very non-specific to the point I am attempting to convey to the reader. With further thought and elaboration, I was able to provide a much smoother thesis statement. “With the overwhelming grasp technology has over our generation’s children, I strongly believe alongside my colleagues that our youth are struggling to recognize the primitive nous required to persevere in the present day.” (Briggs 1-2).